Presently, as I go through grieving and organize my ideas and plans for creations, I am listening to the music I brought with me from my adolescence forward. I’m a 70’s adolescent. My teen years were with Led Zeppelin, Alice Cooper, Edgar Winter, Cat Stevens, and more of course.
The music progressed into the 80’s with some Phil Collins, and my beloved Sting (who bears the same surname as me).
Then there’s music that was brought to my attention by others, that stuck in my soul with the kindred spirit of the musician or composer. Bonnie Raitt, a variety of orchestral symphonies, and odd interjections of C&W, like Randy Travis.
I’m making a list as I listen to the tunes on my computer and mp3. The songs that resonate my feelings through my life, those that harmonize with my sufferings and resolutions are on a list that will coincide with the affirmations and the losses I am writing out to support my experiences with grieving or overcoming as text in my creations.
Its actually both beautiful and horribly sad at the sad time, but then, being an early life Goth-type with Alice Cooper as my dear friend, it’s not surprising my soul would see beauty in dark expressions. In high school, for my soliloquy in my senior year, I recited Vincent Price’s “Black Widow” from Alice Cooper’s “Welcome to my Nightmare” album.That same year my first monochromatic acrylic painting for art class was an x-ray of a human skull with a bullet hole through it, in red.
I’m going to try making short videos showing my processing my creations along with selection of music in the background that go thematically with each step of grieving.
It’s going to take some time for the first project, a wreath. I do however already have the vine from the grapevine in my garden. Every year it grows tremendously from my porch upward into a choke cherry tree in my yard with strands of vine up to twenty feet long. Every year I cut them and pull them out of the tree branches where they attempt to reach the sun, and bring them forcefully down to the earth, strip the leaves from them, and then wind them into wreath shapes while they are yet green. They dry in the shape, and its not always a perfect circle either, which I like, because its more true. Nothing is perfect, and I like that. So that is going to be the easy part because it’s already done.
Tomorrow I shop for supplies and support for my life (groceries, medical needs), and then I will begin as I go through the process of grief art, and the stages of healing and recovery from both emotional trauma in early life and minor brain surgery.
All along, I have to say, when it came to the reality of the tumor in my head, I was reminded again and again of ELP’s “Brain Salad Surgery” from back in the 70’s. Already two of their songs are on my list.
See you soon.